Slow and Cranky Old Men

On Sunday morning, I woke up at 7:30 am as I usually do and bemoaned the fact that nothing was open at such an early hour. I needed to get some files to start a major organization project (because I have a life, really). Well, since Whole Foods was open, I do some grocery shopping and then get a vegetable juice and wait at the bagel place next door to the Office Depot until it opens. However, I noticed that there was a queue forming out front, which I thought was a little odd. I mean, waiting outside in the freezing cold to get into Office Depot? Are they all as excited about starting their filing projects as I am? So the store opens and people rush the place. I go to the back and contemplate the files (I had to get colored ones, of course, and I had to decide whether I wanted the fall or spring themed colors). All of a sudden, there is shouting and cursing. I poke my head out and the curser is a man who is in his 50s, who is with is 80-year-old mother. He's shouting "Fuck this, Mom, we'll just go to Staples!" and flounces out with the geriatric mother in tow. It turns out that there is a laptop of some sort on sale, but only 10 arrived and the quicker, spryer, non-geriatric people got to them and were waiting in line to pay before the old people even registered what happened (slow old people). I go to the back and ask if someone can ring me up so I don't have to wait in the stampede up front - I just have some files. The guy is ringing me up when I hear more shouting. A 60-year-old tubby man is shouting at a poor, doesn't-get-paid-enough-for-this-type-of-abuse shelf stocker who is just trying to get away. Tubster then KICKS over a display of laptop cases. And once they have fallen, continues to kick the shit out of a laptop case on the floor. The manager has to come over and tell him to calm down or he will escort him from the store. At this point, I decide to leave.

I left shaking my head and feeling superior until I remembered the I cried at Carmax. OK, fine, I can understand being upset, but I didn't kick the shit out of anything at Carmax. And I was nice to the men helping me - I knew it wasn't their fault. Just like I was very nice to the CompUSA people even though they were clueless bastards. And kicking shit is not a good look for a tubby man. But it greatly added to my day.