Saturday, July 7, 2007

Oh, Brother....

My Friday began like most Fridays, awakening at 5:30 AM, surfing the internet, consuming 5 cups of coffee, settling in at work. Until the phone rang somewhere shortly before 10 AM. On the other end was my brother, my older sibling asking me if I'd seen his laptop case. Of course, being at my office, I did not see his laptop case, and told him as much. At which point he & my mother ask me to go check my car. You know, as if I have nothing better to do at work then run down to my car.

Of course, blood is thicker than irritation, so I complain bitterly to my co-worker that my family CLEARLY thinks I do NOTHING at work all day, but gamely run down to the car. Opening the back door, I spy a black nylon bag. A laptop-sized bag. Calling my brother back, I inform him that yes, he DID leave it in my car, and WHY COULDN'T HE HAVE TOLD ME THIS YESTERDAY? So maybe I could have dropped it off BEFORE WORK? No worries, he says, check & see what's inside, maybe he won't need it.

Opening the bag, I see some old pens, receipts, the usual. Until I arrive at a book. THE ONLY ADVANCE COPY OF THEIR BOOK IN EXISTANCE, apparently. As Matt begins swearing, my mind races, as I had taken off a few days this week, and I know what's coming. I tell him I'll ask my boss if I can take the book to him. If it's that important, I'm going to look like a total asshole if I don't bring it to the airport. Oh yes, did I mention his plane is leaving? In about 2 hours? From Dulles, which is like an hour away from my office in MD? Awesome.

Frantic, I run back into the office, where I shout "MYBROTHERISARETARDANDLEFTHISLAPTOPBAGINMYCARIAMLEAVINGRIGHTNOW"
and begin shutting down my computer. But my boss is in one of her endless meetings, and I need to track her down. As the clock is ticking, I start running across the office, bursting into the WRONG meeting, then finding the correct one, where I actually say to my boss: "My brother is a fucking idiot & left his laptop case in my car. I have to get to Dulles, STAT." Seriously, I am a tool. Luckily, my boss is decent, and lets me leave, as I run out, yelling back, "I promise I'll finish all my loans today" and take off.

I jump in my car, which is running a little low on gas, and the low tire light is on, but fuck it, I don't have time for this shit, and speed off. As everyone knows, I have a lead foot. Speeding along, I slow down momentarily any place I know cops might hide along 270 & 495. Racing on to the toll road, I slow to what seems like a near crawl, but is slightly above the speed limit & call my mom, who is taking my brother & sister-in-law to the airport. Turns out I'm less than 5 minutes behind them, though I was 20 miles further from the airport. I race into the Dulles parking lot, roll down my window & hand off the laptop case. Mom flings $4.00 at me for parking & I speed off, back to work-for though I will work from home that afternoon, I still have a lot on my plate, and need to get back to my files. As it stands, I know I'm going to be working late on my own dime to make up for this. Good times.

Total time to get from office to dulles to home: 1.5 hours. Right in the middle of my work day. Amount of street cred lost at work? Immeasurable. Awesome. Who takes off in the middle of the day to drive a BOOK to their brother? Their OLDER brother, I might add. Isn't he supposed to be the responsible one?

Let me tell you, he owes me big time. I'd better get a good Xmas present from him this year.

1 comment:

Quintam said...

Plasma television, baby. He owes you. Pain in the ass.