I Heart Electricity

So, as some know, I'm on vacation in sunny Florida this week. Also known as "land where I will never, ever be able to set foot outside, as I've developed an allergy to SPF". But that's neither here nor there.

This morning, for the 5th morning in a row, I awakened before 6:30 AM. Why, you inquire? First it was the fact that our bedroom (our being me & my 18 year old cousin. Yes, I'm sharing a room) is outside the kitchen. And my father & uncle make coffee at approximately 3 AM every morning by making as MUCH NOISE AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE. This morning, however, things were to be different. We had placed a ban on sitting in the chairs of doom-the ones that are too heavy to pick up & scrape across the floor at roughly 10 decibels...everytime someone so much as looks at them. So, hopefully we would be able to sleep in.

Alas, I awakened to an annoying beeping sound. It was somewhat sporadic, but very insistant. As I lay in bed, stewing, I noticed that the fan was lazily coming to a halt. Odd, I thought. Wonder who turned it off? My cousin lurched out of bed to brush her teeth, as it was futile to sleep through the robotic beeping. That's when we realized-the POWER WAS OUT. Yes, no electricity. Which means not only no A/C, but NO COFFEE.

My parents & uncle come stumbling out of their rooms, wondering about the lack of power. That's when it hits Dad-the coffee machine is DEAD. There is no FRENCH ROAST to be had in the house. Panic ensues. We hurriedly stumble into clothes & dash out the door to the land yacht to take us to Starbucks. As we're driving along, my mother notes that none of the houses have lights. The hysteria begins to mount. The Starbucks, 5 minutes down the island, is of course, shuttered-no power there, either. In desperation, we tumble back into the car, and start off towards Sanibel-the next island up. Another 10 minutes go by, and we notice that the windows are still dark.

Cranky from lack of coffee, we grumble about making the hour drive onto the mainland. Coffee is a serious issue here. Mutiny is about to occur when we spy a lone Hess gas station. People are walking out with...yes, can it be? COFFEE CUPS. The day may be saved! We rush out of the car, nearly pushing each other down in our haste to get our ambrosia. Which, as it turns out, was brewed over an hour ago, and is both lukewarm and stale. Sadly, it is pointed out that this may be the ONLY COFFEE ON SANIBEL OR CAPTIVA. Armed with our styrofoam cups, we trudge back, cradling our lukewarm, weak coffee like it is precious treasure.

Heading back to Captiva, we have the brilliant idea to make instant coffee. Mmm..Taster's Choice for all! Sadly, we cannot ignite the stove. Stupid electricity. Curses, foiled again! Until we remember the grill. Yes, we lit the grill to boil water for INSTANT COFFEE. How sad is that?

And boy, is that junk ever repugnant. Damn you lack of electricity, for making me drink crap coffee. I'll get you back, I swear, if it's the last thing I do.

Oh, and the power did come back on, at about 12:3o PM. So now I have my Starbucks to console myself with.