The Manila Files, Episode 5: Bribes

Driving down the street with a couple of guys from work. Diplomatic tags, diplomat driving, we can do no wrong, right? The driver makes an illegal u-turn right in front of a bevy of traffic enforcement officers, and drives right by as they try to wave us down. All still good! Except that the light changes, and unlike most drivers in Manila, the driver actually stops. Thus begins 20 minutes of my life that I will never get back.

After scrambling for a vehicle, the traffic dudes pull up behind us and come to the window. Of course, at this moment, the light changes, and Manilans everywhere begin to honk is if they all had passengers about to give birth. We finally pull out of the way, and the "officers" pull IN FRONT of us, and back up close to our front bumper. The guy driving, trained in such things as evasive driving, doesn't like this, and begins to back up a bit, to leave room to get out if something crazy happens. "Cops" back up again. Oh well.

Thus begins 20 minutes of back and forth between the driver, the traffic cop, his supervisor, and the Embassy's security officer. We have been instructed never to give up a drivers' license, if, for some reason, you ever want to see it again. Apparently here if you get a ticket, it serves as your temporary license, and your permanent one is confiscated. You get your real license back when you pay the fine. It actually makes a kind of sense, as an incentive for you to pay the fine. However, we are having none of this. Unfortunately, the driver didn't have his diplomatic immunity card on him, or his embassy badge (because it was a SATURDAY), which would help prove his diplomatic status. No matter that he's driving a diplomatic vehicle, and the front passenger did have his diplomatic immunity card. The officer wanted the license, and he wasn't giving it up. The officer would not write the ticket without the license, despite constant entreaties to do so. Classic stalemate, between three Americans and one Filipino whose uniform was prettier than his English.

At some point during this proceeding, the traffic cop mentioned that the fine would be 500 pesos (about $11). I'm sure he knew he wasn't getting the license from us, especially since he could clearly see that we were diplomats. So I wonder, was he asking for a bribe? If we had just handed over 500 pesos, would have have walked away? Sadly, I didn't find out. Eventually, the driver showed the cop his car registration and license together (through the barely cracked window, so the guy couldn't grab anything), proving that he was the registered owner of the vehicle with diplomatic plates, and must therefore be a diplomat. With a stern warning to "always carry immunity card", we were on our way.

I want that 20 minutes back. More time to stare at the walls of my hotel room, waiting for Friday night and my flight to Hawaii...